Thursday, December 25, 2014

She Will Never Tell You What She Wants, But Will Expect You To Know (excerpt)

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Here's the beginning of the chapter "She Will Never Tell You What She Wants, But Will Expect You To Know." We thought it was apropos to share for Christmas and the giving season! Subscribe to receive the entire chapter for free here or at the end of the excerpt.


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She Will Never Tell You What She Wants, But Will Expect You To Know (excerpt)

Most women actually think they are asking for what they want, and don’t realize they’re about as obvious as a whisper in a windstorm. They give you hints and clues with subtle indicators like winks, head nods, and leaving a window open on the computer, and figure... Well he must know. I gave him all those clues. Meanwhile, most men simply wish the women in their lives would straight-up just say exactly what they want without all the detective work.

Why is this the way it is? Well, it comes down once again to how women communicate and perceive things. You think you’re speaking the same language, but you’re not. Women use a secret language, a covert way of communicating that is full of physical, emotional and verbal subtext and innuendo. The funny thing is that for women, their subtext-laden language isn’t subtle at all. To them it is perfectly obvious, like the nose on your face. They truly think everyone talks this way. This is why women overanalyze and think there is more to what you say than what you actually said. You've heard it before, after you say something very clear and simple, your woman asks, what do you mean by that? They hear subtext and subtlety because that’s the way they hear as well as communicate.

To you, the man, it often seems as though your woman is just rambling. To a woman, what they said was simple and direct, even when it seems they have not said anything. Remember, they are communicating even when they are not talking. The real rub is that a lot of the time what she means is the opposite of what she is actually saying.

For example it could go like this:

You:
Hey babe, Jenny wants us to come over for the pre-game party.

Her:
Why? You know how I hate her.

You:
What are you talking about, you talk to Jenny all the time?

Her:
I don't want to go to her barbecue.

You:
But... You... But she’s like your best friend.

Her:
But that doesn't mean I want to hang with her all the time.

You:
Oh... Okay. So you want…. us… to… not go?

Her:
(giving you a nasty look)
We can't not go, are you insane? You said we would go, and plus that would be insulting if we didn't go.

You:
So... You doooo… want… to...go? You just said you didn't though.... I'm confused.

Her:
(looking at you like you’re stupid)
Just because I said I didn't want to go doesn't mean we shouldn't go.

You
(more confused)
Ok?.... What are we doing?

Her:
(pissed off)
Did you not just listen to me! Let’s just go!

Dizzying isn't it? She is operating on a completely different set of rules...


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